I recently stumbled over these words “Highly Sensitive Person” and I was surprised because I was just discovering it’s existence; after reading so many books on understanding Self .Every angle on this topic pointed at me and the descriptions were all mine, all mine…I thought ..”Am I truly a highly sensitive person? …”what is to love about being a HSP?”.The descriptions were what people said I was in the past, in the present and I heard this later in the day “Hey gurl,you take things too personal, relax”. I can’t even remember what I was even so passionate about that day. I started searching and reading up this HSP stuff.
I told my innerself ,”You shouldn’t desire or take pride in identifying with a rare personality type rather you should take pride in being yourself or being who you are,stop it already” . But curiosity was much stronger ,drawing me. I learnt that being highly sensitive can feel like a burden most times but once you learn to accept yourself as you are, you can then discover the amazing gifts that come with it as there are so many things that cannot be explained, and can only be felt.
During the Cosby case,I got vehemently personal about Bill Cosby’s jail term, I just sat on my workstation in Nigeria imagining how he may be feeling , feeling his way around the cell, I saw the picture with the chains around his waist and the nearly blind eyes,”why did you do it?” was taking peace away from me. The heavy burden of sitting alone with the “Sexually violent predator “ name attached on this America’s Daddy, I was dragged back to reality by my friend who happens to be a Lawyer …” Remember the sixty ladies” she said. That was when I closed the rush of emotions by login in to my PC to work for my money.
I later got excited , a little bit over when I learnt the new Zealand prime minister took her baby to the UN meeting , it got really personal like I was once sent away at a UN meeting for a baby I am yet to carry. I loved it totally.
Was I expected to gladly fit in the HSP box and celebrate myself or was I supposed to reject it as a mere classification or a box for humans to understand each other better? I was also told HSPs were just cool like that and they had strong points and they also numbered some situations they were meant to flee from or avoid, the explanations poured in.
I reached out to my bestie trying to explain why this was the reason behind him calling me dramatic sometimes, extremist and weird sometimes. I was finally seen something that explained me and how I reacted to the other things of life so strongly, I also saw somewhere that HSPs even have a broken internal emotional meter, chai! Which is why they either love you passionately or the hate you passionately when you hurt them. Sometimes I ‘d wished I had a box for people in between these two extremes where I can put some people till their hurt heals up but here was I feeling things way too much, hurting too much and I was like “yes, this is me” and the response from my friend to my amazing discovery was …“ I feel like eating Akara”. I thought of wiz kid’s reply to his baby mama when she complained of his absence on Twitter. The superstar simply typed “where do I find Amala in Milan?”
How to identify one.
HSPs have words like “Thank you, please and excuse me” laced in their speeches all the time.
Their emotional reactions are amplified , more compassionate so they act with much more concern for the emotions of others.
Everything is intensified to HSPs; certain sounds are annoying, even bright lights can drive them insane.
They prefer working from home or alone, or tiny cubicle somewhere away from the crowd.
They have a hard time making decisions because they are always more conscious in situations where there is no wrong and right answer, busy weighing out the pros and cons and considering the tiniest details.
They are excellent team players;though they wouldn’t be left in making the final decisions.
They are likely to be depressed or anxious especially when they had bad experiences as children.But having supportive people around will prevent anxiety, not all; develop anxiety though.
They are intuitive; they go deep to try to figure things out.
Realize there is nothing in turning down violent movies.
They have this gentle power though they are often viewed as weak and fragile.
Signs you are a HSP.
You can just easily tell if something is wrong before you.
These things like raised emotions, avoiding negativity.
Feel worked out easily, fatigue
People tell you that you are too sensitive or emotional, but they tell you stuff.
Highly imaginative, creative.
The desire of the hearts.
Day dreaming throughout the day.
Sometimes called weird and crazy.
Sadness is sorrow; Joy is pure ecstasy,
Empathizing without limits.
You hear this “you should really toughen up” All the time.
Careful! Highly sensitive! The first day I saw a preterm baby in the incubator , I instantly ran out ?followed by a banging headache.I had to come back and focus on the heartbeat and I eventually loved the little survival.
Overstimulation-quickly gets overwhelmed or overtired by the world around, everything is too much on the senses.
50% of HSP s are men, surprise surprise!!! Mozart,Gandhi, and of course s woman,Mother Theresa.
HSPs are not geniuses .They only create connections, they feel every pain so they try to save many , I dare say we shouldn’t hide out intuition, imagination and empathy.
We are all sentitive but at different degrees. Let us rewrite the negative narrative of Sensitivity.
Understand children that are sensitive, don’t beat them into toughening up, due to the soft spoken nature .I learnt that they are often left behind on the corporate ladder.A lady once said “ Invite sensitive people to the table, and humanity and integrity will be restored”.
Pause and when you want to tell someone that he or she is too sensitive.
Hey HSP,be unashamedly yourself, stop trying to toughen up, don’t feel weird in this world of wars.I learnt that Butterflies do not like captivity; so do not hide away from the hardness of this world. You don’t have to be a highly sensitive person to care.
Finally, create a beautiful and humane path for the times ahead.